The World is a Vampire

March 8, 2010

Now that I know someone has actually read this thing (hi Rick!) I guess I should work on keeping it up to date.   There hasn’t been much good news lately, hence this entry’s title.


Mikael Rudolph, a.k.a. Mikael the Mime, passed away in the company of friends on February 26th.  By all accounts he was gaining strength, had more energy and was in generally good spirits.  Then on Feb 22nd he started to experience pain, a lot of pain, by Thursday they had the pain under control with meds, and he passed away the next day.   They said he was finally ready to go.  The Scarborough community has lost 2 others recently, that makes 4 in 4 months.  It’s been a shitty year for faire folks.

Phil, Hunter’s brother, received more bad news this past scan.  They’ve found another mass, this time on his other lung.  The kicker is, they can’t operate yet because he’s also got a few blood clots and they have to get rid of those first.  He’s on blood thinners, but every day they wait is another day for the mass to grow.  On the up side, he’s got his new prosthetic leg and is having a hoot (on Facebook at least) talking about it.


I had my nose broken at the Dropkick Murphy’s show last Monday.  The back of some guy’s head from the mosh pit connected with my face and…well…my face lost.  The swelling has finally gone down enough that you can see it better.  The bone itself isn’t broken, but the cartilage and the bone have separated.  I have got a bit of a bend in it now and a beautiful purple, yellow and green shiner that I’m quite proud of.  It’s too bad I didn’t take photos of it two days before, when it was purple from eyebrow to cheekbone.

They don't call them "Dropkick" for nothing

My souvenir from the Murphy's concert

“But other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?”
The concert itself was amazing.  They have to be the best live band I’ve ever had the pleasure of watching!  Hunter couldn’t go, so I talked Rebecka into letting Jason go with me.  He loved it too.  Hunter and I also checked out the Flogging Molly concert a few weeks ago, too.   It was fantastic, as usual.

Word from my mom hasn’t been great.  Her new husband, Jerry, had his leg amputated last year due to complications from his diabetes (it’s been a bad year for legs in my family) and they’ve been dealing with that.   Then she went into the hospital a few weeks ago with fluid in her lungs and had to have her lung drained.  I’m not sure I ever truly understood what caused it.  She tried to explain it to me, but I couldn’t make heads or tails of it.  She’s home now and feeling better, so there’s some good news at least.

OH…last but not least…I have a new camera, so expect lots of great photos soon.  It’s a Pentax K-x and it is…RED!  Beautiful candy apple red!  It’s also a great camera, but the fact that it’s red just tickles me for some reason.  Here’s a pic:

Flashy, eh?  Well, it’s not THAT flashy, I could have opted for this version (not sure if I’m in love with it, or it’s overkill…but it’s definitely eye-catching):

Well, I know I’m missing lots of stuff but that’s the rundown on the big things.  Maybe I’ll update this thing again before the Summer.  Thanks again to Rick for reminding me that I had a blog.


Things seem so much more important now…so much more urgent.

I’m sure you know by now that my little brother’s cancer has returned. Phil, true to form, is telling it straight with the snappy wit and stunning sense of humor he’s always been known for. He’s my brother and, honestly, the strongest person I know. He’s going to beat this. He did it before.

I should take a moment to tell you that my brother and I weren’t particularly close growing up. Honestly, we fought…hard. Most of the blame for that can be laid directly on me. I was, frankly, quite a bully to him. I can’t tell you how I’ve regretted that over the years. I’ve always wished I could go back and change things…do it all over again…but I can’t.

One thing I always did, though, was fight FOR my brother. Nobody got away with picking on him. I remember hearing a rumor that Phil got cut by another kid at summer camp. I grabbed what weapons I could find and went on a rampage through the camp to find and punish (in the most capital of terms) the poor fool who made the last and most idiotic mistake of his life. Thankfully, this rumor was untrue. Phil was fine. Turns out some kids thought it would be funny to see how I’d react. They didn’t think it was so funny later on…

On my 18th birthday a kid picked on Phil at school. I cornered the kid in the spot in the library where nobody could see us and proceeded to head-butt the kid until he went limp and fell to the floor. I was worried I would go to jail (considering that I was an ‘adult’), but the kid really should have been smarter.

Our mom always tells the story of the day Phil was brought home from the hospital right after he was born. She said I screamed, “That’s my baby!” and proceeded to give an anatomy lesson to everyone about “my baby’s fingers, toes, nose, and eyes”. Somewhere along the way I took a turn…a horrible and regrettable turn. Our fights were frequent, violent…and completely my fault. I’m so sorry.

I’ve regretted how I treated my brother for many, many years. Now my brother’s cancer is back. The prognosis isn’t good. All I wish I could do is fight this bully instead of him.

TP: It’s not fair

December 8, 2009

Phil and Nathan

Phil and Nathan do a lap a the Relay for Life walk

We received news this week that Hunter’s brother, Phil, found out his cancer is back and appears to have metastasized to his lungs.  I knew I shouldn’t have done it but I started looking online and reading about it and…well…I shouldn’t have done it.  None of the prognosises I’ve found are promising.  Phil is a great guy, smart, funny, a wonderful husband and father.  He and his wife have been through so many health problems together, both her and him, that it just doesn’t seem fair that they will have to deal with this now, after everything, it’s just not fair.

“Life isn’t fair.”  I’ve told my kids this so often over the years that they no longer say, “That’s not fair” anymore.  Well, dammit, this isn’t! They have a hard path ahead of them and they’ve already been through so much.  Phil is a fighter, and he’s stubborn as hell, so I’m confident that if anyone can kick this bastard ‘Cancer’s’ ass, it’s Phil.



To ice the proverbial cake, I received word yesterday that one of the entertainer’s at Scarborough, Mikael the Mime, who I am proud to also call my friend, is working with his medical providers to transition him to hospice care.  He was diagnosed with therapy related Acute Myelogenous Leukemia in late August and has been in the hospital since undergoing chemo.  The sick joke of the whole thing, is that his Acute Myelogenous Leukemia is caused from radiation treatment of cancer, the radiation treatment he received 2 years ago when he successfully won the battle against rectal cancer.  He lost his father to cancer 7 years ago, and his sister a year ago last month and now he’s facing his on mortality at 51.  He was healthy, exercised regularly, taught dance, ate well.  He did all the right things, but it didn’t matter in the end.  The very treatment that would have saved his life has dealt him this hand.  It’s just not fair.

Dammit…I can’t finish this.  Not today.  Nothing is written in stone, Phil can beat this damn filthy thing and I refuse to give in to negativity, no matter what.

I love you Phil…and you’re going to beat this!   You have to!

I’m off to grab whatever sleep I can, if I can.  Dammit.